I’ve put a lot of thought in to the old adage “the grass is always greener on the other side.” It’s a way of saying, “If I only had this / chose a different path / were better, then I would be happy.” It also serves as a warning that what may seem like ingredients for a happy life may, in fact, not be all their cracked up to be.
It’s so easy in the society that we live in, that we have created, to find evidence to support a feeling of not enough. Even the most conscious and confident of us can get trapped in the maze of comparing ourselves to others, trying to keep up with the Jones’ (those annoying Jones’!), and succumbing to a sense of lack. We see every day the dichotomy of “haves and have-nots.” If we fall somewhere in between the world of “I’ve made it!” and “Am I gonna make it?” we can slip down the slippery slope to the dark pit of “I’m not enough.” And honestly, each one of us has probably stood in each of those positions at least once in our lives. At some point we’ve probably all found ourselves feeling that we weren’t living up to some greater expectation. It’s part of the human condition.
But listen when I tell you, it’s all about perception. Your perception is your reality.
In the grass is always green analogy, if you were to step over to the other side, you’d then be looking back at your own original lawn and IT would be greener from your new vantage point. It’s a trap. If you don’t change your perspective, you’re never going to feel like you’re enough.
Take a look at where you are. Be present with your life as it is for a moment. Undoubtedly imperfect (perfection simply does not exist), know that you created this present-day life and you are learning and growing through it. Appreciate the grass that you have. Tend to it, water it, nourish it. Dance in it, lay in it, stand in it with your bare feet and wiggle your toes around. Be grateful for it. Even for it’s flaws. Look at the abundance around you and allow any perceived holes be filled up with gratitude.
Only from this perspective can you clearly see where you want to go. You can feel whole in the life you are living and identify what you want more of in your life. And WHY–that is a key question. Will it bring you even more peace? Will it open up even more opportunities? Will it increase the level of service I can bring to others? Will it make my light shine even brighter? If your why is outside of yourself, then you’ve got some more gardening to do.
Living with gratitude, desiring growth/expansion/even greater abundance, knowing that it is possible, and believing that you are worth it are the secret recipe to setting goals and being genuinely happy. Without one of these ingredients, you’re going to be living in that land of scarcity, of not enough.
Think about it for the next couple of days. Follow these steps and watch the change that happens in your life.
1. Begin and end each day with giving thanks for something in your life.
2. Think about one thing in your life you would like more of. It would make sense that this was one of the things you gave thanks for in step 1.
3. Every day for the next 3 – 4 days close your eyes and envision yourself living with that which you wished for in step 2. What do you feel like? What surrounds you? Get a clear picture in your head, for just a few uninterrupted minutes.
4. Look yourself in the mirror at least once a day (or as often as you like!) and say “I am worthy of everything my heart desires. I deserve to live an abundantly happy life.” Feel silly doing that? Good. Do it twice!
Commit to this exercise–make the time for it (it won’t take much). Keep a journal and write about your experience each day. Then write about the beautiful things you see appear in your life. And please share them with me! You can post them below or on my Facebook page.
Now, get on and be happy in that pretty little lawn of yours!